I Hear You
As a responsible, emotionally mature, tuned-in, available, deeply feeling guy, I think it's vital that we acknowledge the experiences of others. Struggles. That's what I try to do here. To make you all feel valid and loved.
This morning, while surfing, I took advantage of my inner monologue. As a higher being with an inner-monologue. A Schopenhaurian inner-monologue supremacist. I don't know why, but I began to fondly recount a girl from my workplace. And how her just and courageous actions played apart in one of the most profound experiences of my life: when I learned to acknowledge valid feelings. Which I now do here, at this very blog.
This was back in the day, but I remember it as clear as yesterday. She was promoted to a station by boomer men beyond all experience and human reason. I was flabbergasted at the time, having a good old chortle here and there, but just went with it, realising that little can be done against such madness.
It was one of these cases where it all still wasn't enough for her. That’s what I thought at the time anyway. But I was to learn, thankfully, that I was just being ignorant. So, so ignorant.
One afternoon she decided to offer me a transcendent, post-colonial spiritual experience. A white male privilege operating software update.
Picture a young woman squawking at me, justifiably of course, at the local pub while I tried to have a relaxing beer and some salted cashews. I was staring dejectedly at the dregs of my 4th pint in 20 minutes. Enduring yet another day as a well-adjusted contributing member of society. With all the meaning Jordan Peterson tells you such a life is pregnant with:
"YOU DON'T KNOW MY EXPERIENCE," she said, "MY EXPERIENCE IS VALID." I was to later realise that this was completely valid reaction to my wrongful assertion that it “was all okay”. “Being made a director at 26 isn't too bad”. Can we all just maybe talk about the weather. I chuckle and nod my head as I write this. I was so ignorant back then. I had no idea how to hear and acknowledge the words of others.
Now you may ask “did you say something that triggered that particular response?” And you would be right to do so. The truth is, for once, I didn’t say much other than what I have recounted above.
Anyway, what’s important is how it ended. With her politely and strong-womanly dominating the conversation with her valid sophisticated thoughts, to rightly teach me and all the other white men a lesson about how badly she’s had it in life.
After a while we all learned to be better men and the conversation moved on to sportsball. It really was a joyous time now I think about it.
At about 1am after reconsidering my prior held positions, I received a text message. It was a picture of a gutter, with a puddle of water. I texted her “what’s this?”
"I just took a piss out the back of the pub. Fuck the man!"
You think I jest, reader? I do not jest. I was shocked and impressed at this courageous act.
Truly directorial material, I thought to myself…as my now socially aware head crashed on to my pillow. I learned that night to gladly step aside from my privileged position to acknowledge her and her experience. She needed to be heard, and the power structures that be need to acknowledge her experience. Yes. The fact some had been tortured for 20 years trying to reach the same position was irrelevant. I was to learn it was feelings that count.
From that point on its safe to say, I was a changed man. Now profoundly inspired by the struggles of the downtrodden. I’m so grateful that she shared her truth with me. My preconceptions unravelled. A great weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Clarity struck me like a lightning bolt. There’s now nothing more inspiring that the self-interested words of a human being. The noble stories it tells itself. Its valid stories and experiences.
I learned how important the human beings interpretation of their experiences are. This is the gold standard for me now. As readers of this blog know.
It's essential that, like her, we're heard. How we're valid even though the naughty powers that be oppress us. What ails us has nothing whatsoever to do with us. Its everyone else and we need to start taking a proverbial piss in a back alley.
How wrong I was, as someone who formerly believed that human beings were little more, in a cosmic sense at least, than the bacteria that grows on elephant turds.
I'm sorry to say that I was way out of line. I’ve been way out of line here and I’d like to say sorry.
So, to all who have been deeply hurt and challenged by my writings: Your experience is valid, yes. I feel you. I feel for you.
I'm here to listen to you express your feelings and your grievances. I want to listen. Our words are important. Your words are important. What we say and feel is just so valid, ok.
The man is out to get you, and we need to stop him. Our cries, our words, our experiences, they need to be heard. I now see and feel the cries of the oppressed, yearning for liberation from the evil other. We as good, being kept down by them as bad.
I am at one with your decision to urinate in public, or whatever form of rebellion you wish to take. To jolly well teach everyone a lesson—to show them that you simply won't comply. And you won't comply for the good of all mankind. But yes, oh yes, you WILL be heard.
Non conformist - to be rectified. Damn straight. I'm so proud of you.
More relevant to me is our struggle against the globalists. I feel a deep sympathy for aristocrats of the soul who are participating in this great battle. They also need their experience, truths, and ways to be acknowledged to fully flourish. Dem troofs.
We must stand against the man because, after all, it is the man who is at the root of all our problems. The man needs to hear us. Hear us roar. Our words. Our speech. Our proud ways.
I heard recently, "I'm not permitted to be a sexual being". "Society won't let me be a sexual being". I hear you guys.
We can feel ourselves through this together. Now sure, having seen some of you I wouldn’t permit you to be a sexual being either. But that’s besides the point.
We're in this together. We can fight the good fight, comrades. Together. Against the oppressors. The others who oppress us. They are frightened of us and how powerful we are, of our natural, god-given, inborn power. That power we yield as a mighty sword of cosmic justice online. They will hear us. We are instruments of karma.
The new eugenic aristocratic class must be heard and their feelings acknowledged. It's crucial that they can express their essence of sexualness. Sexualness is the essence of maleness. And let me tell you, we're damn frustrated we don’t got no essence of maleness right now. We're damn frustrated, and we're going to comment strongly about how frustrated we are about it all.
We're going to be taking our pleasure back from the man. You know, we're not even angry because we're above that, just frustrated. I'll piss all over this backstreet until I'm given my due ration of pleasure from society. It’s society that’s stolen my pleasure tingles. And maybe it is.
The left can't be the only ones who get acknowledged and heard. This is entirely unfair. What about my free speech? What about the marketplace of ideas? Most importantly, what about the discourse?
I agree with you that we have just as much right as anyone else to be heard and acknowledged for who we are.
Hold the line, comrades. And know you have a shoulder to cry on here at Chateau Le Breathwish.
The Inertia Droid
I never come to you without someone saying something stupid that makes me think about a more significant theme. For me, dummies online are the sauce of my creativity. Unfortunately for you, there are plenty of dummies out there.
The radicool notion I put forward at this subplank is this - we can't always blame things outside of us for everything that happens to us. Or how we orient ourselves and the results that yields. Even if there are forces at work, it’s still not fruitful to do so.
I don’t want to come across as cringe lord Jocko Willink, i have my own brand of cringe. But like it or not, he’s got a point.
What we think about ourselves is usually a convenient story. What we think about why we’re miserable is almost always a convenient story. Although we’re largely the result of things outside of our control, we typically ascribe our patterns an incorrect causality. And anyway, it doesn’t matter too much, because we’re the only ones who can change our lot. But there are also levels to this game.
The human beast is essentially an inertia-driven life form.
Once it's on a path, or more correctly these days in a rut, other than running into mother necessity by way of a significant shitfight, it's unlikely to to change its ways, even if its life is total rubbish. Most meat puppets can’t even understand this as a possibility. Think spiritual types.
Even so, it enjoys possessing fantastical notions about itself that in no way match the reality of its often sordid, or as we will see, fundamentally deadened state.
It is an inertiac animal, also a word-mad animal in the words of Korzybski. So it has an enormous capacity to fool itself about what’s really happening.
These days, presumably as way to try and claim back our birthright, we spend all our time online crying in the manner of frustrated little babies (I mean this literally, not as an insult). And I say this no matter what your apparently deeply held brand of injustice comprises of.
Before we go on - I want you to keep something in mind. Frustration is not anger. I will expand on this next week.
Having spent some time myself in the guise of a frustrated infant online, I can confirm this is indeed the case. As a result, nothing ever happens. The nothing ever happens crew are absolutely right.
Here's the hard truth—the greatest enforcers of compliance, of obedience, are ourselves. We are a self-policing population. We be te ones who be keepin us down. This compliance takes place on levels barely any of us are aware of. This should be understood as more subtle than just political compliance. Part of this compliance is the subversion or taboo on some of our most powerful drives. Though in adulthood, we are the ones that regulate them.
The fundamental driver of life, all life, is arousal. Arousal is the biological precursor to nervous system tonus, hormonal cascades, and all sorts of other things - it is organic and primordial. If we are anything, we are arousal. this cascades into sensations, emotions, you name it.
What is also true is the necessity of socialisation. Anyone who's seen that girl raised by chimps or wolves or whatever it was can see that's the case. So we need to get a handle on what's necessary and what's not.
What gets in the way? What enhances us?
What is unnecessary is some of the ways socialisation is conducted, or rather, imposed. Poorly thought-out socialisation and happenstance pollution, we could say.
Maybe this kind of thing isn't this wonderful, intelligently perfected "evolution managing force" that people like to think it is.
It seems more likely the case that what's good enough is enough. What works right now to facilitate more units being squeezed out is enough. More worker bees for the colony.
We should keep in mind the words of molecular biologist Francois Jacob:
"Evolution is a tinkerer, not an engineer."
You may say, "weeewww akshuawy, I don't beweive in ebowushun", - and to you, I say good try - but not good enough. I’ll still tell you that clearly God is a tinkerer.
Our neuro-cognitive design is pretty clearly a hodge-podge, 2-dollar store, Chinese knock-off job. This has impacts downstream so that basically not a whole lot of stuff that goes on makes any sense. When you really think it through.
Think about everything you should be able to do easily at the click of a finger. But struggle with. Think about how you're sometimes assailed with memories from decades ago that serve no purpose, as another example we can all relate to. There's no reason most of these things that are better for us should be struggles to implement. This is more likely all just the non-sensical precipitate of an ice cream scoop, no-frills service, budget brain.
"…Discussion of the brain is most often delivered in a breathless, awestruck voice. In these works the brain is "an amazingly efficient 3 pounds of tissue, more powerful than the largest supercomputer," or "the seat of the mind, the pinnacle of biological design." What I find problematic about these statements is not the deep appreciation that mental function resides in the brain, which is indeed amazing. Rather, it is the assumption that since the mind is in the brain, and the mind is a great achievement, the design and function of the brain must then be elegant and efficient. In short, it is imagined by many that the brain is well engineered. Nothing could be further from the truth. The brain is, to use one of my favorite words, a kludge (pronounced "klooj"), a design that is inefficient, inelegant, and unfathomable, but that nevertheless works. More evocatively, in the words of the military historian Jackson Granholm, a kludge is "an ill-assorted collection of poorly matching parts, forming a distressing whole."
-David J. Linden
So to think that culture, which is a reflection of the architecture of the brain, is then somehow objectively excellent and intelligent, and dem' ways are anything other than some kind of chance fuckup that may or may not work for a while - that kind of outlook implies that the apparatus itself is perfectly and elegantly designed.
What's worse, the further we escape the immediate and grounding concerns of a primitive environment, the more obvious its shortcomings become. To anyone with even an inkling of self-awareness.
We can talk till the cows come home about how this or that social force of political thing does this or that, or these words are the wrong words - but these kinds of things are a surface nuisance at best. They are a reflection of deeper levels of cognition, socialisation, and happenstance. A kind of snowballing insanity that never gets checked. This is probably why we crave destruction. It’s our only way out once things get totally munted beyond all saving.
With Linden's supreme quote in mind, we should also note that most cultures have died out. There is seemingly no god-given golden path. Many get depressed at this, but I think it is remarkably liberating.
For example, in another life you may have found yourself greedily and proudly munching on your enemy's brains and testicles, while your beloved ancestors shrunken heads hang from local river reeds. The heads gently swaying in the breeze near your Moa-bird turd-powered hearth. You feel great at this moment, victorious, as Uncle Grugs head, in particular, seems to you to be proudly though admittedly somewhat blankly, acknowledging how powerful you've become after this latest cannibalistic battle extravaganza. All this just as the local volcano decides to rudely ignore those virgin sacrifices from last night and blast you and your 1st cousin communitay into a molten cloud of ash.
Ah, yes, the fruits of intelligent, complete, elegant engineering design (Though for all its unpleasantness, this scenario far closer to what the brain is really designed for),
So - for human socialisation and cultural practices this is my point: there is apparently just "good enough" until it gets out of alignment (like for us right now) and collapses into something else, or you get arse blasted by natural phenomena. So there’s nothing particularly wonderful or personally enhancing about whatever chance processes you’ve been subjected to. We as bio-individuals should be happy civilisation is collapsing. For us in many ways it’s a good thing.
Darwin said - what survives survives. Not that the fittest survive.
The same goes for cultures and cultural habits in my opinion and my experience frankly. (Always remember I only ever write about what I’ve experienced. I never abstract on something I’ve not experienced or done. I know this only because as I went through this).
So even though many of us view these processes fondly and fiercely defend them against all attacks, this does not mean there is anything beautiful, relevant, or qualitatively spectacular about these processes. They’re just familiar, and maybe they work ok overall to facilitate a good compliant population.
For someone doing bio-individual work, in bringing to light much of this self-diminishing energetic pollution, this is critical to understand.
Our peculiar culture, owing to its unhistoric universality I believe, has resulted in an overly complex mishmash of hangovers and hangups. Some that make sense, most that don't. Arousal pathways have been tampered with in many strange and bizarre ways over long periods. Also mixed in with the particular mental illness of the individual and those around him or her. Many of the ways we approach life are completely absurd. We all know this as adults, if we’re honest with ourselves. And we’re all very, very dishonest.
All this kind of mindfuck is recorded in the human body, which is the great keeper of records. You can read someone’s history and character in their body, not even joking. So as far as I can tell, the ability of the human body to express its impulses effectively and without them diminishing us offers a yardstick for understanding what works and what doesn't.
If we stifle anger for example, we get taught that by someone who believes anger is naughty. There are then downstream impacts of this. Anger doesn’t leave right. That’s impossible. Maybe we can’t express anger as it needs to be expressed. Maybe we can’t express is appropriately, as we turn it inwards, or blow up destructively after years of being bent over like Gil Gunderson.
Same goes for sex. Even the greatest sluts I’ve been with are very often completely uptight in their bodies. So their sluttiness is really just a silly attempt to lash out against their programming. Because that’s what the left prescribe as the anti-dote. But this lashing out changes nothing, and simply results in them being a bitter, washed up whore that still can’t feel pleasure 10 years later, after 10’s or 100’s of disappointing, though what they tell us as liberating experiences.
Maybe some of them then turn to traditional morality online - you know the types - the ones many of you follow hungrily and call queens, vying desperately for even a smidgen of their acknowledgement. Again - none of this gets to the root of it all. No pun intended.
It’s not just them, most of us are not physiologically integrated sexually - and this is often a result of idiotic moralfag socialisation practices. this pathos is in turn etched into the body and its tissues, that actively work against the expression of that impulse. More on this next week.
It's also important to note that each human has their own peculiar mental instabilities, which they gleefully and proudly pass on to the unsuspecting, innocent members of the next generation. Many of these beloved beliefs and ideals result from what amounts to fear. Fear truly is the mindkiller. I’m sure Frank Herbert knew how deeply this all runs. Fear truly the mindkiller. Fear has been holding this species back for far too long. And us for far too long.
Before I get straw manned, which I always do by the way, for sure socialisation is necessary as part of a socialisation process so that we can socialise these little criminals we call children. Sexuality and anger also require a process to be adequately and yielded in an enhancing way.
The question for us then is, how much of these shenanigans are necessary?
Does it need to be this way?
How much is a mere inheritance of a droid species that never thought about what it is in these terms?
What can we learn from other cultures that turned out well?
When can bad or anti-organic ideas exert too much control and start to impact the quality and trajectory of the animal itself?
Most importantly, if we indeed live by our contention that the body is the vault of knowledge—which we broadly don't in any meaningful way (some people think this means going to the gym)—then what do our bodies tell us about whether a particular process that affects our psycho-physiological reactivity is enhancing or diminishing?
What is it about these ideas and lifestyles that yield the source of life—arousal—as self-destructive, not self-expansive?
I'll return next week to discuss the taboo against angy fee fees in part 2.
Cheerio
“The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wise people so full of doubts.” -Bertrand Russell
“Belief is the death of intelligence. As soon as one believes a doctrine of any sort, or assumes certitude, one stops thinking about that aspect of existence.” - Robert Anton Wilson